friends, fellowship and fullness

I am reminded of the importance of friendship and fellowship in our lives. Last night Tim, a young married man and father from our church took time out of his busy life to reach out to our son Drew and get him out of the house for a few hours. As much as Drew is thankful to be here with us, he spends much time here alone when we are working or at school, and sometimes gets very bored. He is in a very transitional time right now. He is in need of a job and hoping to hear something soon. Each day is another day that he sets out to overcome his addiction once again. We are so proud of him. The years of drug abuse have taken a toll on his teeth and he will see a dentist on Monday. We are trusting God for the finances to cover this.

We are so thankful for those who have reached out to encourage Drew, taking time to get to know him. He is an amazing young man. I realize even more how important it is to reach out to people when they are going through seasons of restoration as I am witnessing the life of my son. I try my best to get him out when I can. Yesterday we went grocery shopping, to the library, the Daily Grind Coffee shop, and Walmart. We are really trying to eat "clean" food and Drew has been such a help for me. He cooked dinner last night again because he wanted to. Piccadallo Chowder and rice patties. It was delicious and healthy. Some days Drew looks so healthy and vibrant and other times very tired. He said he hasn't slept well for several nights.

This week he will begin a drug treatment program. He has been clean for almost 9 months now but we know that it is important that he get the counseling and help he needs to continue to be successful.

Inside this young man are dreams and visions that we know God will enable him to fulfill in time. We ask for your prayers for all of us.

This morning in my devotional time I was reminded of the importance of holding our empty cups to the Lord and asking him to fill them with his love rather than trying to fill it with people and things that are incapable of filling us. A quote from Beth Moore "Our hearts are not healthy until they have been satisfied by the only completely healthy love that exists: the love of God himself." I know this to be so true. As mothers we have many who need our love and care but first and foremost we need to be filled with God's love before we can minister His love to others. I cry out as David did in Psalm 143:8: "Let the morning bring the word of your unfailing love, for I put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul."

I am trusting God for each step in the journey ahead. He will remain faithful. Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers.

today is my wednesday off both school and work so i was able to enjoy the morning with mahlon (my husband) and drew (my son). we all love coffee in the morning and now that drew is home we always have to make a second pot. he jokes that it is his "ale" and i think to myself how glad i am that his "ale" is now coffee. it has been over 8 months that drew has been sober. i know that each day is reason for us to celebrate this victory!

so...as i am writing this, i feel as though i need to pinch myself to see if it is all real. well, i just pinched myself, it hurt, ha ha! it is true, our long lost son has returned...he is home....though we know it is for a season of restoration, healing and preparation for his future, we are thankful for each day that he is here.

i don't want to lead you on to think that it is all just so easy; transitioning as a family has it's difficulties but we grow stronger through each day. we all have our quirky ways about us but you know that is part of what makes us uniquely different.

i smile when i think about our times....to see his grin...it is a gift to me...yes even when it is coming through his sometimes sarcastic humor. he tells me not to get offended and that i need to just get used to his humor. so...i am trying to do that and at the same time i realize he too needs to get used to my way of communicating. so together we are learning to share our opinions respectively...this is good.

it is really funny when he comes downstairs in the morning and speaks his little phrase of dutch. it is something that he and his dad get a real kick out of. but what i enjoy most about this is that he wakes up and comes down the stairs and into the living room with a smile on his face. i have waited so long for this...to witness the smile, the twinkle in his eye, to hear his voice.

what you are reading, keep in mind, is from the heart of a mother....a mother who waited for a very long time for this season.

every day we hear new stories of his adventures over the last ten years of his life....i never heard the term "gutter punks"before, actually i am finding out that there is a whole other world out there that really i know nothing about but through drew i am learning many things. i have come to realize that where i live is only just a little piece of a much larger picture of the world. one thing is for certain no matter the person, or where and how they live....they all have common needs...love...food...shelter....and a sense of family. our son was out there in a place that i may never know or even see but i think of those whom God put in his path to help him and i am so thankful.

the other day when mahlon and i were on a date to canton we saw a homeless man (drew said the homeless like to term it "houseless") and i was moved to give him money. he was sitting there on the snow covered ground holding a sign "need prayer, a job and food." it felt good to do so....maybe it was a "pay it forward" to all those who reached out a hand to our son when he was out there holding his sign.

we are finding out that drew really can cook and he has taken on this duty quite well on the days i go to school. it is a real help to the family. drew also loves music and i never thought he would ever like bluegrass but it is true...he does and he has even introduced us to some i can handle listening to. actually there are many genres of music we are all finding we enjoy together. drew is an avid reader and we have always known that he was quite intelligent. we are thankful that his brain is in good working order. not everyone who has been drug addicted has that benefit. i know that he knows God has protected him in so many ways.

one of the things i really enjoy doing with drew even when he does beat me....is playing Scrabble. it is time for him to get beat again.

we are praying that drew gets hired soon. one of his biggest struggles is what to do with time on his hands. he has been helping at our church food pantry and he loves that. he has a real heart for hurting and the poor. well, i must close for now...prepare lunch and then get my homework and exercise in for the day.

so here we are in the middle of january, 2011. it was just 2 months ago that our son drew returned home after 6 years. this homecoming was one that i believe hundreds have prayed for on our family's behalf. some of you reading this post may be one of those and if so we want to thank you and ask that you continue to pray, for the journey of healing continues on. i shared with drew when he returned that i thought we should consider setting up a blog to share our journey with others in hope to bring encouragement to others who may find themselves in a similar situation.

from my postings you will hear from my heart as a mother.

being a mom is i believe one of the most important callings in life and i am so thankful for the opportunity to be a mother of five children, each uniquely different and wonderful. i love them so much. i have to warn you that i have so much i could write but i will just be giving tidbits along the way.

so in the six years that drew was absent from our lives, he never once was removed from our hearts. but....as a family we had to go on, we had choices to make...i especially remember realizing that i could let the fact that my son was out there, many times not knowing where, not hearing from him sometimes for months at a time...he was hooked, being consumed with addictions that were destroying him...yes i had to make a decision...would i allow hopelessness destroy me like an invading disease of the body or would i trust God, would i keep on living, grow with my family who surrounded me, who needed me, who longed for my strength to be renewed. thankfully i chose to trust God....oh there were so many times that if it weren't for others' encouragement i would have been swallowed up by the dark cloud of hopelessness. after all, when days turn into months and months into years, it is hard at times to wonder if hope will become a reality. i often felt as though i were grieving drew's death over and over but something kept rising up within me to believe that he is still alive and God's arm not too short to reach him wherever he was at.

so in these posts you may hear reflections from the past and also the present, for it all has come together in what i now see as a beautiful miracle of God's redeeming love poured out on our family. for our son is home! in future posts you will hear stories of our daily lives together as we walk this journey together, learning to know one another all over again. you can follow drew's blog also and be encouraged by his journey.